So this past week I had my heart squashed in a pretty big way...I'll save the long details but a fairly close friend of mine thought she would take the liberty to tell me that my kids have very disappointing personalities (introverts/shy etc.) and questioned my parenting skills, needless to say it hurt BIG TIME. So of course I did what came naturally, I got angry, I cried, I vented, and then I told her to mind her own business and decided with friends like that who need enemies? The point of my post (and there is a point) is that this is not the first time "stuff" like this has happened, not about my children but something similar. It seems that people love to tell me what I do wrong or give me unsolicited advice, this is often frustrating and hurtful. I can, however, say that in a weird way this "friend" taught me something about myself...
1. I can run 5 miles when angry and listening to Pink's "So What"
2. I need to find better quality friends and pay attention to the red flags in new friendships
3. People in Washington are not nicer than New Yorkers (sorry)
4. and the most important...I need to get some self confidence!
I think people are so willing to tell me how they feel because I come across as insecure and do often question my way of parenting or ask my friends a lot of questions about how they do things. I do this because I am always looking for new ideas, tips, and sometimes advice. Everyone knows I have an extensive library of parenting books! That, however, does not mean I am a bad parent, wife or friend. It means I am aware of my weaknesses and want to work them out. I cherish a friend who can point these weaknesses out in a loving way but to be honest the buck stops at criticizing my children and the choices Jeremy and I make for them.
In life there are introverts and extroverts and personally I have no problem with my kids if they happen to be introverts. It does not mean they are behind or lack socially. I am aware of my children's strength's and weaknesses and I am thankful that God made them the way they are. So, in an effort to work on my insecurities I have decided to run a 5K, ditch some "not so nice" friends, focus on the things I am good at and just love on my amazing family...because in the end what family thinks and needs is what matters most.
need a good inspiring blog read? click on Enjoying the Small Things button on the right, Kelle is AMAZING and her joy is contagious.
8 years ago
Are you flippin' kidding me? Definitely cast that person out of your friendship circle. Life is too short. It's true, there are mean people everywhere. New York, Seattle, Paris, mean people are everywhere. So are nice people though. Chin up. Surround yourself with people that make you happy and make your life better. It's that easy. If a person doesn't contribute to your life, but instead takes away, you need to distance yourself.
ReplyDeleteYour kids are amazing. Introverts are needed in this world. I have Thomas and Joshua. Born only one minute apart. Raised in the same exact environment. One is a born leader, extrovert. One is anti-competition, a born follower. They make a great team. Your children are perfect the way they are. And the world needs them to be that way.
Keep up the good work mama!
i agree with your friend,everyone is different & thank goodness! i could go on & on about what a mental midget (my dad always says that)that person is to tell you these things, but be done with it! you children are beautiful, healthy & HAPPY kids...nothing else matters!!! you are a great mom & i've always looked to you as a mommy role model!
ReplyDeleteby the way rock on with your bad self on the 5k run, you are inspiring as usual. love you
Hey, I just saw your comment on my blog about running 5 miles and I was coming over here to say Yay for you! and I was going to say that you should sign up for a 5k because it makes running way more fun when you have a purpose and here you are already doing it! Good for you! Also good for you to stick up for your kids--I missed an opportunity to do that recently cause I was too worried about the confrontation and I'm still mad at myself for that...so be proud of yourself as a mama bear too!
ReplyDelete