control freak

Although, my circumstances are slightly different, I can't help but relate to this guest post (just scroll down below the "I am not in charge" picture to get to the good stuff).  It's no secret, not at all, as a matter of fact, perfectly good strangers know that I want a 3rd baby, everyone knows because I talk about it. all. the. time. I am relentless.  I cry.  I pout.  I fight.  I whine. I beg.  I wonder (often) why God loves and blesses others and not me.  It's tough.  It consumes me.  I am sad.  I am 34.  There is no 3rd baby on the horizon and for that matter there may never be and that is a really painful realization, really painful.  But, as I read this post, I was reminded that God has complete control of my life.  He knows what is best, I do not.  It's so hard to give up the control.  It's hard to have so many pregnant friends.  It's hard for me to not complain and whine. It's hard for me to appreciate what I do have.  It's so very hard to let go. I want this 3rd baby so bad, but I need God's will for my life even more and that is why I will be holding onto Proverbs 3:5-6, so I can learn to let go and let God.